Following God: Why I joined the Episcopal Church

When you first went to school (high school, college, or other), what was the first conversation you had? 

What were the first questions that were asked of you?

If you are like me, it is the same questions ANY student is inevitably asked. "Where are you from?" "What major are you?"  Perhaps the teacher's favorite ice breaker: "What is your favorite  ________?" Then you begin to stress out over whether your favorite _______ is as cool as everyone else's favorite _______ and then you wish you were somewhere else (personal experience speaking right here). In all these cases, questions are a good way to get the ball rolling and the ice broken in the conversation.

However, when your major concentration is based within Christian studies and theology, like mine was, AND when you are attending a broadly Protestant university, there was also a third standard question: "What (Christian) denomination are you?" When I would happily answer, "The Episcopal Church," the extremely common reaction was confusion. There were very few colleagues and friends in my undergraduate department who even knew that there WAS such a thing as the Episcopal Church.

This reaction is also common among people who knew me when I grew up in central Arkansas. I attended the same Baptist church from the time I was conceived (pretty much) until I moved off to college at age 18. So, when I moved off and started attending the Episcopal Church, I was met with some suspicion. 

And yet, I believe, that this suspicion is only natural! Hey, if I was a good, strong, Christian Baptist who knew someone from the time they were born until the time that they left for college, I would be interested in knowing why they left the Baptist church as well!

The funny thing my story of coming to the Episcopal Church (of which I am currently going to seminary to become a priest) is that my story makes no sense to some of my friends and mentors from back at home. 

So, in the spirit of love, I would like to present Three Reasons why I believe God called me to the Episcopal Church. 

Whether you agree with me or not is completely fine! I just hope this is a helpful framework for understanding me as a complex Christian person.

Three Reasons

Reason 1: I followed God to the Episcopal Church. 

This reason may not be the most satisfying answer to some people, but it is true nonetheless. Why am I confident that this is the case?

Because I have asked God, "Why in the world are You calling me to the Episcopal Church" more times than I can count. 

And every time I asked, God clearly answered me and gave me peace in simply following the plan that Our Lord has for me. 

For example, here is an experience that I had when I was an undergraduate in 2012. During my studies in my field of Christian theology, I was becoming more excited and appreciative of the theology of the Early Church Fathers of the 100-500s C.E. Church, also referred to as the catholic church (side note: the word catholic is originally from the Greek word katholikos meaning "universal" or "with respect to the whole"). I personally was becoming more convinced of the ancient theology of the Church over and against some problems I had been having with certain modern day theology.

I had attended the local Episcopal Church for about 2 years at this time and I felt like I was beginning to gain roots in the warm community of believers. Then, one Sunday morning, our Sunday school class had a discussion over our understandings of who God is, and the discussion fascinated me. Not one person described God in the same way, which was frustrating to me personally. I mean, after all, shouldn't it be the case that even the simplest Christian should be able to describe God? This, to me, was a modern problem that I found (and still find) absolutely infuriating.

Yet, when we entered the Eucharist (the worship service held on Sunday mornings at my church), something became apparent to me: I was worshiping a God who is beyond all measure and beyond all human language. I was stepping into the presence of Someone whom I had only the slightest understanding of, in all of God's transcendence.

I was frustrated at my fellow Christians for not being able to describe who God is. 

Our Lord met me at that moment and basically said, "Mark, even though people can never grasp or understand my infinity, they still can know me. I love them, and you, that much. Don't be so hard on them!" 

Needless to say, I remember that experience vividly. In the Episcopal Church, God showed me that Christianity is about God, not just about what we think we understand about God. 

Reason 2: I wanted ancient Christianity.

This reason could be self explanatory. Yet, I feel like I need to say a few things about what I mean by the word ancient. 

An easy example is Christian worship. When I mean ancient, I want to step into the worship of God in the same way that Christians since the time of Jesus worshiped. And, as our earliest sources of Christian history can tell us (including TONS of examples in the New Testament), this means celebrating the Eucharist (also called Lord's Supper, Holy Communion, Mass, etc.) every Sunday. In one of the earliest documents contemporary with Holy Scripture called the Didache, there is a precedent for Christians who wish to enter into worship:

Concerning the Eucharist, give thanks this way. 

First, concerning the cup: "We thank you, our Father, for the holy vine of David your servant, which you made known to us through Jesus your servant. To you be the glory forever." 

Next, concerning the broken bread: "We thank you, our Father, for the life and knowledge which you made known to us through Jesus your servant. To you be the glory forever."

On the Lord's day, gather yourselves together and break bread, give thanks, but first confess your sins so that your sacrifice may be pure. ~ Didache 9:1-3, 14:1 (http://www.paracletepress.com/didache.html) 

From the earliest times, Christians celebrated the Eucharist on the Lord's Day. Patterning my worship patterns after the Early Church was something I became convinced of through my own study of the Early Church. This is what I found in the Episcopal Church: a Church that cared deeply about following the historic traditions of Christian worship.

Reason 3: I needed the Sacraments.

It is amazing how much baggage the word Sacrament carries for some people that I know. So, first of all, let me say what I mean by Sacrament. The Book of Common Prayer (the book in the Episcopal Church that contains our worship services) defines a Sacrament as "...an outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace..." (Book of Common Prayer, Pg. 857). The Book of Common Prayer's definition of Sacrament holds that there are two Sacraments: Eucharist and Baptism.

Personally, I like the older Latin use of the word Sacrament. The sense of the word used in the early Latin church fathers gets equivocated with the Greek word mysterion, meaning "mystery." For me, taking the idea of "mystery" and applying it to Eucharist and Baptism makes perfect sense, if one stops to think about it. 

After all, Christianity is based upon a divine mystery: 

God, who created all things, descends to humanity as a physical person in the flesh, is killed, rises from the dead, and ascends back to the Godhead (for a more specific statement, read the Nicene Creed).

Try explaining the mechanics of that statement simply. It took the early church about 300 years to sort it out.

And since this is a mystery of the highest sort, the closest we can come to grasping some understanding of this mystery is to think about and act out this mystery. Thus, the celebration of what Our Lord Jesus instituted and commanded to be done: the Eucharist and Baptism (among other things as well). 

I needed the Sacraments because my understanding of God is massively lacking. I don't know the mechanics of how God became flesh, or what precisely happened when Jesus was resurrected, or how Jesus seemed to be able to POOF in and out of locked doors after his resurrected.

But you know what? I believe it happened. Because that is my Christian faith, and the mystery of faith is why I needed the Sacraments. 

Conclusion

My journey of Christian faith has not been easy nor will it ever be easy. 

What I hope is apparent in this small glimpse into my own life is this: Christians can be of different denominations and still be fervent Christians.

I hope it is evident from my own life that I have never once ceased to follow God. The reason why I ended up in the Episcopal Church in the first place is because I followed God. The reason why I am continuing to grow in knowledge, prayer, and service is because God helps me.

And I hope we all can say, at the end of the day:

"Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the LORD is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation." - Isaiah 12:2 KJV

- Mark P. Harris is an Episcopal seminarian from the Diocese of Arkansas, currently enrolled in the School of Theology in Sewanee, TN. Check him out on Facebook!